Relaxing massage - not

I don't know how to start this update. I'm still confused and sad that my buttocks are in even worse state I thought they were. So I went to have a massage in the morning but the guy did not appear. Someone had forgot to inform the guy I had the first reservation in the morning. I got a new time after noon and went. He only did my lower back 'cause my buttocks are too bad to be massaged. He gave me an example by pushing them only a little and I felt pain and screamed from my heart. I'm really good at keeping my pains just to myself - he's a sports masseur so the massages are always rough to open the muscles better. It hurts even if my shoulders are not that jammed. Now when he did the lower back I held the pain to myself but he said he can feel it hurts. I also felt enormous lumps on both sides of my lower back that were the most painful parts. Then he wanted to feel a little from the sides of the upper buttocks and it hurt so much. It was a gentle touch but I cried from pain. There were more lumps than in my back and all different sizes, it felt like a potato field. 

I explained I've started a new program to support my skating and he immediately caught the skating part and asked for details. I told our practices have increased to 3 times a week and that I do squats almost every day. The reason for my pains probably come from the combination but more from the skating, well at least this is what he thinks from the info I gave him. He has customers that ice skate and they have had exactly the same problems. He said my program sounds reasonable and I'm doing the right things but I need to concentrate on doing them more controlled. The most important thing is to get my derby stance right. He said I probably held my hips in front and I should push them back and under. Now that I think of it this might be a  habit that I've had with running. The running position is to keep your hips to the front and I had to concentrate real hard to learn to do it naturally. Now it has probably come too natural for me and in roller derby I need to get rid of the habit. I need to lift my tailbone to stick my booty out and have my back in a neutral position. The problem is I haven't found the neutral position! Every once in a while I fix my body to a position thinking it might be it but nothing still feels right. I desperately need more advice.

He had a great advice how to fix this problem for now though. The key is to regularly do exercises that open my hips. It is essential that my hipbones keep facing forward and that I lift my other knee up in front of my body to 90 degrees and turn it outwards in a straight line. Then return my knee back in front of me and repeat it as many times as it feels good. I should be able to get my knee all the way to the side to the same line with my body, so that hip would be completely open from that side. At the moment it's not looking that good. It hurts and I can go maybe half way there. There are also other stuff I could do, but I need to study them. I might also go have a massage next week too so I can maybe fish some more advice.

So I've skipped practices this week. I haven't done anything else either. Buttocks are the biggest muscle a human has and it's quite impossible to workout without using it. Today walking isn't painful anymore so I've done a little walking but that's all. The feeling of missing practices and not being able to do any workout is frustrating. But to be honest... This came in a perfect time. I've really needed the extra time given to me and the extra sleep as well. I am more stable and not so tense all the time. Still I want this to be over and do the exercise my hips need. Patience once again.